Love and Death

Grandísimo Woody Allen!

*** Death


"I was walking through the woods, thinking about Christ. If He was a carpenter, I wondered what He charged for bookshelves."

"You're an interesting young man. We'll meet again. / Don't bother. / It's no bother."

*** Marriage


"Granted, I have a few eccentricities. I won't eat any food that begins with the letter F. Like chicken, for instance."

"There are many different kinds of love, Boris. There's love between a man and a woman; between a mother and son... / Two women. Let's not forget my favorite."

"Oh don't, Boris, please. Sex without love is an empty experience. / Yes, but as empty experiences go, it's one of the best."

*** Love and Death


"To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering one must not love. But then one suffers from not loving. Therefore, to love is to suffer; not to love is to suffer; to suffer is to suffer. To be happy is to love. To be happy, then, is to suffer, but suffering makes one unhappy. Therefore, to be unhappy, one must love or love to suffer or suffer from too much happiness. I hope you're getting this down."

"I never want to marry, I just want to get divorced."

"You were my one great love. / Oh, thank you very much. I appreciate that. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm dead. / What's it like? / What's it like? You know the chicken at Tresky's Restaurant? It's worse."

"The question is have I learned anything about life. Only that human being are divided into mind and body. The mind embraces all the nobler aspirations, like poetry and philosophy, but the body has all the fun. The important thing, I think, is not to be bitter... if it turns out that there IS a God, I don't think that He's evil. I think that the worst you can say about Him is that basically He's an underachiever. After all, there are worse things in life than death. If you've ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman, you know what I'm talking about. The key is, to not think of death as an end, but as more of a very effective way to cut down on your expenses. Regarding love, heh, what can you say? It's not the quantity of your sexual relations that counts. It's the quality. On the other hand if the quantity drops below once every eight months, I would definitely look into. Well, that's about it for me folks. Goodbye."

*** Flirt


*** Bottles


*** Honor